today the bf and i went for dinner at red lobster. i always thought it was a really questionable restaurant, but after meeting him i learned that yes, large groups of sad people do often eat there, but it’s not because the place is sad. it’s because the food is amazing!! i love seafood (except salmon for some reason) and i consider warm butter a condiment and you know how i like my condiments! the one problem with the warm butter is the mess. i am generally not the most clean of eaters, plus my larger chesticular area acts as a catch-all for any dribbles, but the minute something is at all greasy, it’s on my shirt.
tonight, we had a really yummy baked pasta dish with about a pound of seafood in a butter and white wine sauce. when the server brought us our food she brought bibs. i’ve always secretly wanted to wear one, but felt silly, but she encouraged us so i decided to go for it. i was still wearing my work clothes and i didn’t want to ruin a perfectly good blouse. best meal ever. yeah the food was great, and the cheese buns are to die for, but the best part was being spill-free!! i did have to wipe my bib a few times, but so what? my shirt was clean.
so i got to thinking, why not wear a bib all the time? well, because i would look ridiculous. but i don’t have to. there are a growing number of products out there, that are getting makeovers to appeal to a more refined audience. like pretty garden shears, or pink tool kits for ladies. it’s stuff we need, but that doesn’t mean aesthetics don’t count. so, here’s what i’m thinking (this is another don’t steal my idea or i’ll come find you scenario) a bib that looks like a scarf. like a plasticized hermes. you can tie it around your neck, keep the drips off your clothes and not compromise in style. i’m totally on to something!!
i feel like a genius right now. i bet this is how einstein used to feel. and i won’t have to live with his eventual self loathing about the whole his invention being used to make nuclear bombs. so basically, i’m smarter than einstein. just you wait, this will be a thing, and i will win all kinds of awards for contributions to humanity.
have a great night,