Monthly Archives: May 2012

things my bff should know – guilty pleasure music edition

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hey anderson,

i know you like a lot of stuff that might cause people to judge you.  for example the ‘real housewives’ shows.  i’ve never watched those.  but i’m not really able to say that with any sense of superiority because i love a lot of junk.  i know the common expression is guilty pleasure, but, to be honest, i don’t feel the least bit guilty.  embarrassed, ashamed or downright disgusted, yes, but at the same time, it’s stuff i love so i just have to own it! 

i thought i would share with you the first of many lists of things i love that i would only tell my bff.  lucky you!!  today’s list is music based, and i have a lot of music guilty pleasures.  i love music and have varied tastes.  i would say that sometimes i am a music snob (i.e. don’t don’t hold your breath for a list of the music i hold most dear).  i know that not all guilty pleasure music is considered “bad”, some may even be top 40 hits in their day .  so this list is basically music that if it played on my ipod and someone heard, i would have to explain myself.  the following is a list of explanations, in no particular order.

Cher

how anyone doesn’t love cher is beyond me.  she is so awesome.  she was someone i really respected when i was growing up.  she seemed larger than life and so very cool.  i’ve seen her in concert twice (once as a 12 year old and once in my twenties) and i was in heaven.  she is cheeky and clever and such a great performer.  i don’t think there is a cher song i don’t like, though some i absolutely love and others i could probably live without.  this is the video for ‘we all sleep alone’ a hidden gem!

Kenny Rogers

i know kenny is the butt of a lot of jokes with his plastic surgery and perma-tan, but his music transcends all of that!! when i was in university i went to see him live with a friend who may have been the biggest fan ever.  she definitely cried.  it was really fun.  i didn’t know the song ‘lucile’ before i met her, but her story about confusing the lyrics (she thought he was saying 400 children and that lucile really was the worst woman ever!) has made this a favourite ever since.  the second time i saw him live i was in the front row with another friend.  she got very feisty and i was afraid she was going to storm the stage, i thought she was going to give him a heart attack!!

The Monkees

i associate this song with my mom.  she was not cool growing up, music was not her thing.  unless you count accordion or flute tunes – then she was all over it!  but she did confess she loved this song.  and after listening to it i realized it was pretty catchy and so much fun to sing along to!

Extreme

every time i hear this song i get a little misty eyed.  it’s so nice.  and reminds me of middle school dances.  the thrill of wondering if someone will ask you to dance, and the sheer terror if they do. 

Justin Bieber

i have never liked a bieber song until ‘boyfriend’.  i thought his songs were catchy, and he was cute. but cute like in the snl sketch when tina fey put him in a stroller.  but now that he’s 18 – hold onto your hats!  this song is pretty great.  most likely because it is so much like a song by that other justin – timberlake that is. actually, in addition to having you, anderson, as my bff, justin timberlake is my husband.  i love that man.  bieber has nothing on him.  and now this song is less appealing to me because i keep thinking the noise in the background is actually whale song.  have a listen, you’ll see what i mean.

November Rain

hands down, best video ever.  and another great middle school dance song despite it’s length.  axl may be an embarrassment now, but i forgive him because in his prime he was the absolute best.  and this song is the proof.

Hall & Oates

not to be a hipster about it, but i loved hall & oates way before it was trendy.

Huey Lewis and the News

when i was 6 my mom and i won tickets to see huey lewis and the news.  it was my first concert and it was amazing.  we met the band backstage – i still have their autographed photo and dried roses. 

Disney Music

i was once driving my vp back from a meeting a few hours away.  i had my ipod on shuffle and a disney song came on.  i was so embarrassed.  so much for being taken seriously.  but i do love disney songs.  i probably have about 50 on my ipod.  ‘part of your world’ was the big song when i was a kid.  i sang it in singing lessons and any chance i got.  it still resonates with me after all these years. 

Paula Abdul

paula abdul was the first artist i loved who wasn’t introduced to me by my parents.  we were visiting some family friends and i brought along my sting and paul simon tapes like the 80 year old woman trapped in a 6 year old’s body that i was.  the daughter was listening to paula abdul and i was in awe.  who was this cool lady singing to me?  why did i want to dance?  i had so many questions.  but i have never once questioned my love for paula.  ‘cold hearted’ is one of the greatest songs ever.  and now that i’m older and actually understand the words it is even better!

Right Said Fred

everyone knows their one big hit ‘i’m too sexy’ but i had their album and this was one of my favourite songs.  it’s auditory bubble gum and i still love it.

Willa Ford

why do i love this song?  seriously, why?  if it were the 1950s i could believe that a pop song is really anti-establishment.  but by the time willa ford came around it’s pretty generic.  but, i do feel a bit rebellious when i listen to this song.  i am such a nerd.

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living vicariously through my memories

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hey anderson,

this time last year i was at the end of a two week vacation in paradise.  this year i am chained to my desk with even more work looming in front of me.  my next vacation is probably months away and this depresses the hell out of me.  so, to help soothe myself i’ve been looking at pictures from last year’s trip. i’m doing this in the hopes that recalling my memories i can experience bit of vicarious relaxation.

i guess i should tell you about my awesome trip last year.  we spent two weeks in the british virgin islands.  it was my parents, my boyfriend, my sister and her friend.  my parents and my sister had been twice before on sailing trips with another family.  i refused to go in the past because i was quite certain being on a boat in the middle of the ocean with family would be a nightmare, and the only way to wake up would be for someone to go overboard in the middle of the night.  so, to ensure i safety, i stayed home.  the second time they went, however, i met them for a second week on land.  and it was heaven.  seriously.  white sandy beaches, crystal blue water and amazing food.  if i could eat crab cakes every day of my life i would be so very happy!

so last christmas we started planning a vacation.  my sister convinced me i would enjoy the sailboat, and we decided to hire a catamaran which meant more space for less potential “accidents”.  and with the bigger boat we could invite other people to serve as buffers.

i cannot stress enough how amazing the bvi are.  they are a real off the beaten track treasure.  and seeing them on a chartered boat is totally the way to go.  the catamaran we were on had 4 rooms, an indoor and outdoor eating area and a front seating area that is mesh and open to the ocean below.  because we don’t sail, and don’t really like working hard, we got a boat with a crew.  a husband and wife team and cooked and sailed and took care of everything.  while they were a tad cranky, and we had to ask to drink the hard liquor, it was great to just relax the whole time.  i finally felt like i was living the life i was meant to life.  my rockstar lifestyle was a reality.  well, if you forget about the seasickness it was a reality.

i love the water.  i’m not an amazing swimmer (i hate putting my head under)  but i could float forever.  and in the bvi the water is like 30 degrees celsius. literally, the water was almost as warm as the air.  it was heaven.  we could just jump off the back of the boat and swim.  i am a huge water person.  if i could float for a living i would.  we bought a waterproof camera which was the smartest thing we did.  the pictures turned out so cool.  everyone else snorkeled a lot, so we got some amazing fish pictures.  i am terrified of snorkeling.  not even all the sea creatures below.  it is wearing the mask that frightens me.  in fact, when we were in the bvi in 2007 i attempted to put on a mask – i freaked out, threw it at my mother and screamed “i hate this, i’m not doing it”.  people stared.  i was 27.  but as you know from when i recently got locked in my car, i do not respond well to feeling trapped.  obviously this is the same for when nothing more than my eyes are enclosed.

this past weekend we had nice weather here.  i sat outside and had a drink and relaxed.  but it just wasn’t the same.  but with the bvi trip more of a distant memory i better get used to what i have. 

hope you’re well anderson.  enjoy some pictures from my trip so you can live vicariously as well!!

~k

i am full of amish and hutterite love

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hey anderson,

it has been months since i’ve written. and i’m very sorry. i think of things i want to tell you, and then i don’t and i feel exceedingly guilty. then i remember that we are only friends in my mind, so i stop being crazy and just promise i will write again soon.

i really do think about you often. i regale friends, family and co-workers about the funny and interesting things you say. thank goodness the people in my life indulge me as much as they do! yesterday i was catching up on your daytime show and knew i had to tell my family about another reason why you and i are destined to be real life bffs.

the revelation: you love the amish. guess what?? i love the amish too! i have never met anyone who is as fascinate by that world as i am. but you are! destiny, right?

my sister thinks my fascination with the amish is ridiculous. we share a netflix account and the mocks me ceaselessly when she sees amish documentaries on our recently watched list. she really doesn’t get it.

i know exactly when my interest began. here in canada, we have hutterites. they have the same religious origins as the amish and mennoites, and live similar lifestyles. when i was in elementary school, our class visited a hutterite colony. i was amazed. who knew people lived like that? when we studied them before going, and made a model of hutterite woman using a laundry detergent bottle i just thought it was a history project. but the women we met totally looked like my crazy tide bottle! and what was even more crazy to me was that the kids were so different, but so much the same as us. we learned that hutterites milk cows, raise chickens and lived self-sufficiently. and the boys played soccer. the girls didn’t, and that really appealed to me because i really hated playing soccer.

for years, that was my favourite school field trip. i loved to reminisce about that day and the people we met. years later, i got a job that involved having contact with hutterite colonies and i was giddy. the first time we went to a colony it was to buy honey for corporate some gift baskets we were giving out. we met andy, the coolest beekeeper ever. he looked like santa claus, but instead of wearing red and white he wore a black hat, pants and suspenders and a checkered shirt. i was instantly obsessed with him. he loved his bees and took pride in his honey.  and had the most precious accent ever!

the best part of my day with andy was that he took my business card and stored it in the brim of his hat. i felt like a rock star. of course, he started calling me. And i soon recognized the colony’s phone  number on my caller id. he always asked if i had a boyfriend. i liked to think he wanted me to marry one of his grandsons. and i totally thought about it.

one day andy invited me to have lunch with the colony. i spent some time with his granddaughter who gave me a tour. it was so much fun! and lunch was so good –  fresh bread with homemade jam. simple and pure, which is pretty much how i imagine everything in the colony is.

of course i know there is a gender divide. the women and girls work hard at domestic and farm work. but it really never seemed to me that the men didn’t work just as hard at their own tasks. i know many people are disaffected by the rules and leave but i still think if i was invited, i would probably move  in. unfortunately i don’t work at that company anymore, and i worry that andy called me  after i left and had to be told we wouldn’t get to chat anymore. i hope he knew having to end that connection was one of the hardest parts of leaving that job.

when i see hutterites out in the “real world” i get as excited as i would if i saw a celebrity. once i saw a hutterite couple trying out a treadmill at a sporting goods store. there is something about the dichotomy that i just loved. Seeing hutterites at the mall sends me into a tizzy!!

someday i hope you and i can talk about why these communities of people who work so hard to maintain their lifestyles fascinates us so much. until then, i will continue being convinced you and i will one day be the best of friends.

~k